Toshiba Phone System

Anyone care to proof read my cover letter for an employment application?

i know it's far from perfect but any suggestions would be greatly greatly appreciated! if you want to email me back any changes my mail is nfrank89@gmail.com here's the AD im responding to http://seattle.craigslist.org/skc/sad/1106300052.html Hello! My name is Nick Franklin and I am responding to your craigslist ad for an IT Support Specialist. The thing that really caught my eye from your ad was not the title; it was the “jack-of-all trades” statement as that is what I have always considered myself to be! Reading further only added to the excitement as line by line I read about the perfect job for me! I currently work part time for a small startup IT/Customer support business in Seattle called In City Networks, LLC. I have a great relationship with my boss and my clients but the business is on the back burner right now and we are not actively acquiring new clients so there isn’t quite enough work to pay the bills. However, I love the job. In City Networks is similar to Best Buy’s Geek Squad, we provide Hardware and software support, peripheral installation/support, we even help setup home theater systems. And all of our services are provided remotely or in person. I am also familiar with documenting my work and using that as a tool to troubleshoot future problems and keep track of steps already performed so I do not waste time and money implementing steps and procedures which have already taken place. As I said before, I am a jack-of-all trades. Not only in the IT field though, have my skills ranged from automotive repair to cooking to just about anything! I am motivated to succeed at any task that is thrown my way and I do so very thoroughly with attention to detail. Whenever I come across a problem that I cannot troubleshoot on my own I put my research skills to work. I use all tools made available to me to find the answers to any question or solve any problem I may have. I also provide excellent customer service and communication, two things I learned while working as a cashier at QFC. Throughout my educational career I have served as both a great team player and leader. As a team player I do my part to make sure all that is expected of me is organized and completed on time. As a team leader I use my communication skills to keep in touch with all group members and to motivate those who may be slacking or having trouble. I’ve covered some of my knowledge and skills but I’ll focus more on that now. Problem solving is not only a skill, but a hobby of mine. I enjoy the challenge and the praise after solving problems. I like to feel that what I do is important and helpful and this motivates me to work harder. I can see that this position is one of importance and I believe that I will perform well. I am quite familiar with traditional phone systems and less, but also familiar with VoIP systems. (Nothing a little research can’t fix!) Again, my main duty with In City Networks is to provide customer service and technical support so I am already experienced with remote and in person assistance, contract negotiation, and procedure documentation. Another thing we believe in at In City Networks is teaching our clients as we go and helping them prevent future problems. Bringing this skill to your company can definitely increase productivity over time by helping employees understand how to solve and prevent common issues. And finally, I am familiar with network devices such as AP’s and firewalls. I can easily research or be trained to use any equipment that I am not familiar with. I am currently unable to finish college due to lack of funds but still wish to begin my career. Please consider my application. If the position is no longer available then I would be interested in an internship if that is something you can offer. Anything I can do to get my foot in the door because this job seems to be exactly where to begin my career. Thank you very much for your consideration, -Nick Franklin

Public Comments

1. Address City, State, Zip Code Phone Number Email Address Date Employer Contact Information (if you have it) Name Title Company Address City, State, Zip Code Salutation Dear Mr./Ms. Last Name, (leave out if you don't have a contact) First Paragraph The first paragraph of your letter should include information on why you are writing. Mention the position you are applying for and where you found the job listing. Include the name of a mutual contact, if you have one. Middle Paragraph(s) The next section of your cover letter should describe what you have to offer the employer. Mention specifically how your qualifications match the job you are applying for. Remember, you are interpreting your resume, not repeating it. Final Paragraph Conclude your cover letter by thanking the employer for considering you for the position. Include information on how you will follow-up. Respectfully yours, Signature Handwritten Signature (for a mailed letter) Typed Signature Now, apply all that you said up there in your questions, to that type of format I listed and you should be okay. I didn't really care to do it all myself, but the format of the letter is very important. If you want repost another question with some of the sentences and paragrahs that you're having trouble with, instead of the whole letter... That way more people would be willing to hlep you proof and edit (myself included). Good luck.
2. Way too long Way too much detail Keep it items you will be using in the new job (not auto repair & cooking) Don't even suggest "any equipment that I am not familiar with." even if its true
3. One thing to be careful about: you don't want to keep saying that if you don't know an answer then you will do some research. it's fine to mention it once. But don't give the impression that you only ever solve a problem by doing research. There are many skills that you have that you can apply without having to remind yourself or having to check online what other people have done. Also, there is no need for too much personal story. It's great to say that you love your current job but business is down. That's really positive and that you get on well with your current workmates. But you don't have to tell them that you can't afford to go to college right now. They can't give you a job from any sense of pity, it must be on merits of your resume and interview. You don't have to say 'please consider this application' - they will obviously consider anything that gets sent in. But I do like describing your personality and it does come through and show you in a good light. But less written would make more of a positive impact.